Podcast Review: The Unexpected Journey (Of Becoming A Carer)

When Illness Changes Everything

Lately, I've been enjoying listening to podcasts, and recently I discovered an episode featuring Emma Willis on The Oprah Podcast. She opens up about her unexpected journey as Bruce Willis's caregiver following his diagnosis of FTD (Frontotemporal Dementia). Excellent interview, btw. Very informative. I think it’s one of those discussions where we could all take away something valuable.

It definitely resonated with me. Although her situation is obviously vastly different - each one is - the conversation took me back to a particularly life-changing time in my twenties. I was breastfeeding my one-month-old when the phone rang. My mom had suffered a massive stroke during the night. The doctors told us her brain was severely damaged. There was nothing more they could do. I remember it like a fever dream.

Even though she survived the stroke, her laughter was stilled, her voice quieted, her movements restricted. She was at the complete mercy of those around her and who loved her.

My big sister took on the monumental task of caring for our mom, becoming her primary caregiver. I can’t speak for her, but I appreciate the immense mental, emotional, and physical strength that this role requires, especially when it’s a loved one. As Emma mentioned in the podcast, you often feel a strong sense of responsibility to take it all upon yourself. You feel guilty for asking for help because this is YOUR husband, YOUR mom, YOUR child.

Why No One Should Carry the Load Alone

Every caregiving journey is unique and often shaped by complicated relationships. It feels even heavier when the relationship between you and your loved one is strained. I wouldn’t call my relationship with my mom strained, but it certainly wasn’t all rosy. There was a lot of hurt and trauma, making it challenging for all of us. Listening to Emma’s journey and hearing from others who shared their unique experiences as caregivers on the podcast made me eternally grateful to my sister for doing everything she could to ensure Mom was comfortable during her final years with us.

Thankfully, my sister eventually asked for help from a nearby nursing home. That decision saved our family from a lot of anger, hurt, and disappointment, allowing us to “deal and heal” while mom received the care and stimulation we simply weren’t equipped to provide.

There’s obviously much more to my story. Only those who have suddenly and unexpectedly been thrust into a role requiring full-time care for a loved one experiencing a severely debilitating diagnosis will understand how complex and nuanced each situation can be. One constant, however, remains true across all situations: caregivers need all the help they can get. We are often unprepared for the mental, emotional, and physical burden that comes with taking everything upon ourselves. So, if you know a caregiver, check in on them. Offer something small. Don’t wait for them to ask for help because asking is often the hardest part. It really does take a village.

10 Reasons To Support Carers

1. Every journey is unique


No two caregiving stories are the same.

2. Illness changes everything


Life may never return to what it was before.

3. The load is invisible


Carers juggle emotional, mental, and physical strain.

4. Guilt is heavy


They often feel they must do it all alone.

5. Relationships shape the role


Past hurt or trauma makes caregiving even harder.

6. Asking for help is brave


Support is strength, not weakness.

7. Professional care can heal


Nursing homes or services can save families from burnout.

8. Carers need their own space


Without help, they risk losing themselves.

9. Small acts mean a lot


A meal, an errand, a kind word lightens the load.

10. It takes a village


Caring is never meant to be done alone.