There’s something weirdly relaxing about Freida McFadden’s psychological thrillers. The twists are genuinely mind-boggling, at least that’s been my experience with both The Housemaid and Never Lie. It’s not quite as atmospheric as I usually like my thrillers, but it is quick, easy, and ridiculously fun.

As you may have seen in some of my other book reviews, I love discovering little nods to my birth country, South Africa, so of cause I got properly giddy when Ethan finds a bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon from Stellenbosch and Tricia notes that a lot of great Cabernets comes from South Africa. We make only a brief appearance, but it’s a powerful reflection of Cape Town’s wine culture and the ripple effect its prestigious wine regions have on the rest of the world. Our Cabernet must’ve really impressed Freida.

The story is written in first person from the perspectives of Adrienne and Tricia.

Adrienne seemingly has it all: a successful career as a psychiatrist, seeing patients in the sprawling home office of her Westchester mansion in the Hudson Valley. She’s a bestselling author and even volunteers her time at a low-income clinic in the Bronx. She’s a peach… until one lie changes everything.

Throughout the book, I was convinced I had it all figured out. I knew whodunit. Oh, how wrong I was.

I’m afraid I might spoil it for you should I go on, so I’ll conclude my review here. If being trapped in a secluded mansion in the middle of a snowstorm, a missing body and a potential psycho on the loose is your way of winding down, then you're in for a treat with this one!

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️☆ (4/5 stars)

In my twenties, I couldn't imagine ever being forty. It was unthinkable. Most of our moms were in their forties when we were in our twenties. Forty is for old people; we'd revolt. Yet, we all get to that mythical dystopia someday. For me, that someday is now. But it doesn't have to be all doom and gloom.

Sure, there are the sneaky hormonal fluctuations, pesky weight gain, downright unnerving anxiety, and feeling misunderstood and unheard. It's a hilly road we women are destined to travel, albeit with an aching back and sleep-deprived - all thanks to a little thing called evolution, during which we (hopefully) become better, more sophisticated versions of ourselves. The fact is, we age, and our mortal bodies deteriorate the older we get. It's simple biology, right? Now try saying that to a forty-year-old woman without risking a slap across your supple, wrinkle-free face.

Like I said, it's not all doom and gloom. Catching a glimpse of ourselves in the mirror or stepping onto a scale shouldn't send our mood into a tailspin. On the contrary, I believe reaching this milestone age is a blessing—the "sweet spot," I like to call it. Getting wiser but not quite aged; sparkly but not yet in our golden years; bossing but a long way from being seniors. Those of us with kids may at this stage get to share the joy of them falling in love for the first time, watch them drive their first car, go off to university, and revel in so many more beautiful firsts and life moments.

As a forty-something woman, not only do you still have a full life to live, but for those of us who haven't already, there is still time to start adopting healthier habits. Habits like exercising, making better dietary choices, and going for that physical and mental overhaul we've been putting off for so long. If we've gone off the track a little, our forties are a sober reminder that although time is fleeting and life is brutal, there is still a whole life ahead of us.

The truth is that this decade can be an incredible time for growth, freedom, and joy if we choose to embrace it.

Here are 10 Ways To Thrive Going Into Your Forties:

1. Connect

Connection is the essence of being human, and yet as life gets busier, maintaining relationships often gets harder. Ironically, this is when we need them the most.

How to connect: Join a meetup group, host regular dinners, or simply commit to calling a friend once a week. Connection keeps us grounded.

2. Move

Movement becomes even more vital as we age, not just for our physical health but for our mental well-being too.

Ideas: Pilates, yoga, dancing, hiking, kickboxing, or simply walking more. Move because you can, and because your body deserves it.

3. Create

Write, paint, podcast, take photos - whatever speaks to your soul. Creating something from nothing is healing and empowering.

Benefits: Creativity reduces anxiety, strengthens memory, and gives you a sense of accomplishment.

4. Girls’ Night

Friends are therapy, laughter is medicine, and time with the girls is non-negotiable. Sure, it’s hard to carve out time, but the joy and perspective it brings are worth it.

Benefits: Emotional support, stress relief, and a boost in happiness and self-esteem.

5. Fly Solo

There’s something transformative about traveling alone. Whether it’s a week in Turkey or a weekend road trip, a solo adventure gives you freedom, courage, and clarity.

Benefits: Confidence, cultural immersion, and time for deep introspection.

6. Volunteer

Helping others is one of the most rewarding ways to help ourselves. Giving your time or skills connects you to a bigger purpose and sparks joy in ways money never could.

Benefits: A sense of purpose, better mental health, and a happier outlook.

7. Freelance

Turning your passion into income has never been more possible. Freelancing offers flexibility and freedom. You can start small, alongside your current job, and grow from there.

Benefits: Work-life balance, independence, and financial empowerment.

8. Do It

That thing you’ve been putting off? Now is the time. Learn to play an instrument, train for a marathon, climb a mountain, write the book, or yes, get those braces (I did!).

Benefits: Builds confidence, challenges you, and keeps you young at heart.

9. Be Curious

Take the course, finish the degree, explore something new. I recently completed my Communications degree after years of balancing work, kids, and even moving internationally - and it was worth every late night.

Benefits: Lifelong learning boosts confidence, broadens your network, and reminds you that you’re capable of more than you think.

10. Be a Boss Lady

It’s never too late to start a business. Many entrepreneurs launch their most successful ventures in their forties or later. With digital tools at our fingertips, it's never been more possible.

Benefits: Flexibility, creativity, legacy-building, and a renewed sense of purpose.

"In the past, I’ve always said I write for entertainment purposes only. I don’t write to educate, persuade, or inform. This book is different. This was not entertainment for me. It was the most grueling thing I have ever written." Colleen Hoover.

It Ends With Us is a poignant reminder that not everything is always, if ever, as it seems on the surface. For me, the overarching themes, other than the obvious, are that of trauma and judgment. Right from the start, when you dive into this book, it becomes evident that there is so much more to people than what appears on the surface and that it is never ever okay to judge anyone solely based on their outward appearance. Trauma is another major theme; it comes in all forms and is woven into the fiber of every society. Its tentacles are far-reaching, and its effects are extricated in often devastating ways for both the perpetrator and the victim.

Colleen, through Lily Bloom, scrupulously and authentically navigates the treacherous waters of domestic violence and spousal abuse. Although uncomfortable to witness as the reader, I can appreciate her raw and honest portrayal of how domestic violence often slowly creeps into the relationship before quickly progressing as time goes on. In hindsight, I appreciate the discomfort even more knowing how personal this experience is to the author herself and realizing this novel was a passion project, an outlet of sorts, and not altogether an entertainment piece. I think it’s important to highlight and impress upon the point that everyone is going to deal with the same or similar traumatic situations in different ways, much like the characters in It Ends With Us.

In all honesty, the character of Lily’s mom reminds me of previous generations who did their utmost best to keep up appearances for others and pretended everything was okay—the sweep-things-under-the-rug generation. Instead of speaking up and breaking the cycle of abuse at the hands of her esteemed politician husband, Lily's mom makes the difficult choice to keep her family together in favour of her abuser's reputation and also her daughter's security. As a mom myself, I understand and sympathize that for her, as it was for many women in generations gone by, it's the best way she knows how to deal with the situation at the time. Of course, this decision traumatizes Lily, who, as a young girl, is forced to grow up in such a volatile and confusing environment.

Everyone deals with their trauma differently. While Lily grew into a strong oak tree, Ryle perhaps needed more pruning and watering growing up (both references from the book). One thing remains certain: everyone comes out on the other side of traumatic experiences a different person from who they were before. It either makes you stronger or breaks you. Broken, however, does not mean irrevocably irreparable, and that's where I believe many of us falter in our judgment against the abuser. However, the brutal and heartbreaking reality is that for people who have lived a life of unimaginable trauma and abuse for too long, it is extremely difficult to break the habit, and in It Ends With Us, this is Lilly and Ryle's reality.

Towards the end of the novel, the theme becomes extremely somber. As is human nature, I hope against hope that Ryle magically (without any professional help and within the space of only 300 pages) changes from a jealous, raging abuser back to the prince charming we met on the rooftop during the first couple of pages of the book. But alas, life, even in fictional romance novels, doesn't work that way, it seems. Even Colleen admits in the end notes that there were many times she was tempted to change the plot line so Ryle's character wouldn't become the person he turned out to be, however that story wouldn't be true to the one the author intended to share with the world, and it sure wouldn't honour her momma's superhuman strength.

Ultimately, this beautiful story succeeds in teaching us many lessons. My overall impression of IEWU is that of a cautionary tale, that life isn't just black and white, and it often knocks you off your feet by kicking you right behind the knees when you least expect it and from the people you least expect it from. The choices we make in those defining moments of complete and utter defeat set the course for the trajectory the rest of our lives will take.

All The World's A Stage...but in a world dominated by social media, we perform with ring lights and filters. Isn't it strange that in a time when the whole world is at our fingertips, being authentic is slipping through our fingers? We are all tirelessly scrambling to either outperform the other or risk disappearing into the abyss of obscurity and insecurity.

Pretending to be someone we’re not for social, professional, or even romantic acceptance isn’t a new phenomenon. Shakespeare was also not the first person in history to acknowledge humanity's capacity to morph into any persona we think will be more appealing to others. Shapeshifting is one of our oldest superpowers, but social media has turned it into an everyday performance. Because, with complete authenticity, there's always the risk of being rejected, judged, and ridiculed, and that's terrifying!

In my experience, though, being vulnerable (and not a power ranger) is our true power. Vulnerability breeds authenticity, which in turn breeds creativity. Sure, being vulnerable is asking a whole lot from someone who has had their guard up all their life. People like us feel safer hiding behind this barricade of keeping up tough appearances and striving towards the illusion of perfection. To us, vulnerability is the antithesis. We have a mask for just about every scene throughout our lives. But as I step into my fourth decade, I feel a stronger pull to show the people around me - especially the little ones in my life - that being truly, authentically yourself is not only acceptable, it’s powerful. Our flaws, failures, insecurities, fears, and challenges are what allow us to form real human connections. Taking off the mask and going “no filter” gives others permission to do the same.

The alternative is scary. The opposite of being authentically ourselves is fear, and this fear may explain why we have so eagerly embraced social media and its many filters. We cling to it passionately, as if it were a lifeline. Social media has become the drug of choice. Yet, the longer we rely on it, the more we numb ourselves to reality.

The truth is, authenticity will always feel scary, but it doesn’t have to take decades to learn that being YOU (warts and all) is your true power. The sooner we realise the advantages far outweigh the risks, the sooner we start breaking down the walls we’ve built so high around us. I’ve spent years behind my own fortress in fear and self-doubt, but I can feel the walls crumbling now, brick by brick. Every small act of honesty chisels away at the façade and lets more of the real me emerge.

Here are 5 Ways To Stay Authentically You

1. Share your personal stories

Open up about your fears, uncertainties, or struggles - whether in a blog, a journal, a song, or over a drink with a friend. It’s cathartic for you, and it might be exactly what someone else needs to hear.

2. Nurture empathy and connection

People connect more deeply with honesty than with perfection. Perfection is a unicorn. It's a really nice thought, but not a reality. Empathy and shared experience are what build real communities.

3. Your best work stems from your vulnerabilities

"Speaking from the heart", "creating art through pain", "no pain, no gain" are all phrases urging us to be honest and authentic in our interaction with others. Indeed, our most powerful creations often come from a place of vulnerability, from our deepest wounds. Van Gogh poured his inner turmoil into “The Starry Night.” Frida Kahlo painted her pain. When we channel vulnerability into creativity, we leave a lasting legacy.

4. Accept failure as part of the process

Setbacks are an integral part of real life; Even if we try to escape them, we will fail. Failure teaches what success never can. Without my mistakes, I wouldn’t have chosen the right partner, raised my kids with empathy, or grown into the woman I am. Perfectionism teaches nothing; failure teaches everything.

5. Change your perspective on vulnerability

Authenticity is not a weakness; it is a form of courage. Show your children, friends, and community that imperfection is not only human, but it is also inspiring.

So, take off the mask. The world doesn’t need a flawless version of you. It needs the real one.

My toxic trait is researching any topic I find interesting for hours, days, or even months until I basically have a PhD on the subject. This tendency of mine, which borders on compulsive obsession, was of course also true when we started planning our recent family holiday to the Indonesian island of Bali to celebrate my milestone 40th birthday.

I was tickled at the idea of immersing myself in the rich cultural tapestry of this beautiful nation. Unfortunately, thanks to Google, by the time I finished my PhD-worthy research, I had also learned about every horror story about the horrendous Bali belly, the alarming rise of scooter fatalities being reported due to the poor road conditions, and the issue of alcohol-related accidents and sometimes deaths. On my way down this rabbit hole, I also learned that despite its ingenuous name, Angel's Billabong on Nusa Penida will kill you if tempted. Finally, I couldn't bear to read another hyperbolic article and decided it was time to check it out for ourselves.

Instead, what we found was a beautiful people going about their daily hustle, guided by the principle of good karma - that how we wish to be treated is how we should treat others. We discovered an idyllic paradise on the doorstep of countless majestic temples surrounded by breath-taking beaches littered with sun beds for taking in the sights, sounds, and tastes of Bali in complete comfort while dipping our toes in the sand. We were drawn to the characterful laneways through which we wandered for hours any time of the day and never got lost. Although we went during the shoulder season in March, we didn't want to lock in any definite plans before we left Australia because we wanted the flexibility to do activities and to go on tours when the weather conditions were most favourable for us. Our need for complete flexibility is also primarily why we decided to stay at a private villa instead of a resort, and thanks to our hosts at GoVillaBali, I didn't need a Doctorate to plan the perfect Bali holiday. They seamlessly removed all the guesswork and anxiety from planning our family holiday. Whatever we decided we wanted to do, no matter how late at night the idea may have come to us, whether it was a surprise birthday cake, a poolside breakfast, a Balinese massage, a professional photographer, or an island tour, our villa manager made sure it was prepared and ready for the very next day.

Not enough people are talking about the incomparable hospitality of the Balinese people and the warm acceptance we feel not only as visitors to their stunning country but also as participants in their pursuit of excellence. From the moment we stepped off the plane, I sensed an air of grace in their every movement that most of the West can only ever find with true and meaningful introspection and accountability. It is in their very orbit that I discovered that all my previous fears about visiting Bali have nothing to do with Bali, but everything to do with my taking responsibility for my own actions. When planning a holiday to any foreign country, our mind and body naturally ready themselves to go into ‘tourist mode,’ but it’s vital that we also switch on our logical brains, our empathetic brains, our creative brains, our curious brains, and our philosophical brains. Wash your hands when you go to the restrooms; be respectful to the people and their culture and, also, importantly, the natural environment around you; appreciate and acknowledge the often laborious crafts being shown to you; speak to your hosts, tour guides, and waiters about the country you come from and ask about theirs - you’ll find the exchange often sobering. When we travel, we become philosophers, anthropologists, and students of the world. As much as we want to just switch off and go into tourist mode, we need to stay switched on.

The people here work so hard to make our stay pleasant; it’s hard not to fall in love with the island and its people. Perhaps it's not that they work so hard at it; maybe being world-class hosts just comes naturally to them? I believe it’s the latter, and it's this natural ability to make us feel so special that adds to the Bali charm and the reason so many return time after time. I got to enjoy my coconut drink on the beach, and the speedboats and billabong didn’t end up killing us, simply because we heeded the instructions from our guides. We also managed to evade the mischievous monkeys, the millions of scooters swooshing by at every corner, and only narrowly escaped the now infamous Bali belly.

As it turns out, everything on the island is not out to get us. However, the morning after our snorkelling trip to Nusa Penida, a stunning headline flashed across my phone screen that we had shared the same waters with a great white shark - an incredibly rare occurrence for the warmer Indonesian ocean. A scary thought indeed, but undeniably a bucket list moment!

A tropical paradise of fun!

Yes, it’s worth adding Waterbom to your Bali itinerary.

No, it’s not only crazy fun for the kids. It’s entirely possible we may have out-funned them just a little.

Bali is on fire - and not just because of the vibes. Bali is HOT and humid most of the year, and Waterbom is a welcome oasis - a tropical escape when it feels like the heat is becoming too much. We visited during the shoulder season (mid-March), which is technically still rainy season, and, yes, extremely humid, but we were lucky to have escaped most of the rain. During our entire week-long escape to the island, we had only one hour of torrential downpour, in true Bali style, and that downpour happened during our visit to Waterbom.

What happens when it rains at Waterbom? For everyone's safety, the staff locked down all slides and pools during the heavy rainstorm. We were kindly guided to the nearest cafe and offered free tea and coffee while we waited, which was about an hour, as I mentioned before. Believe it or not, but this minor 'hiccup' actually added to the experience and natural charm of the park. Of course, the staff were wonderful and we were back at the swim-up bar and cruising down slides in no time, like it never happened.

Although Bali is spectacular year-round, there is a "right" and "wrong" time to visit, depending on the activities you plan to do while you're there. What we gathered from speaking to locals and conversations we had with our drivers, we chose the perfect time to visit Bali. Like many other attractions we’ve been to during our trip, Waterbom was not as notoriously busy as we anticipated. Expecting huge crowds, we made sure we arrived no later than 10 AM, and surprise surprise, check-in was a breeze, and we were able to secure our pool loungers without having to book a private cabana. The queues for the waterslides were also practically non-existent. Beginners luck? Good planning? Intuition? Divine intervention? Who knows! The fact remains, come rain or shine, Waterbom is an absolute treat for the whole family.

Helpful Information for Your Upcoming Waterbom Visit

We booked our family tickets directly through the Waterbom website. Tickets can be a bit pricy, especially for a large family like ours, but honestly, the memories made are priceless.

Cashless Convenience

In addition to the park tickets, we pre-purchased credit for food and drinks, which was loaded onto a wristband. Each family gets one wristband, and all payments inside the park are made using it. The entire park is cashless, so there’s no need to carry a wallet around (which is a huge plus).

Food & Snacks

There are plenty of cafes and kiosks offering everything from burgers, pizzas, and pastas to savoury Indonesian dishes, refreshing salads, popcorn, ice cream, and sweet treats - all available through the wristband system.

Towels, Lockers & Lounging

Towels and a locker were included in our ticket and provided upon arrival, which was super convenient. You can also book a private family cabana for an extra fee, but we found plenty of poolside loungers readily available and were more than happy to plonk ourselves down right there.

Pools, Bars & Chill Time

There are a couple of pools, each with swim-up bars and loungers. One of the pools even had a volleyball net stretched across it for anyone wanting a bit of action. I personally just kicked back with a coconut and soaked in the good vibes.

It Gets Busy

It’s a big park, and during peak months, it can get very busy or so we've been warned. If you’re visiting with little kids, be mentally prepared for the physical demands and long queues. Just focus on the joy they’ll walk away with, and you’ll have an unforgettable day.

Bonus For Families With Older Kids

Our kids are older now and could explore the park and do all the slides on their own, which gave Lesley and me plenty of time to leisurely stroll the grounds, enjoy some of the slides by ourselves, and sip a drink (or two) at the pool bar.

You Won't Want To Leave

We planned to leave around 2 PM… but ended up closing the park! Literally! Time flew by so fast, what with all the fun, and we didn’t even think to check the clock (our phones) once. Beware: you may never want to leave.

The other night, while the boys were away at soccer practice, I peeked into my daughter’s room to ask her what she was up to. She responded with “Eh, nothing” and continued to scroll on her phone. At that moment, I had a choice to shut the door and dismiss her teenage indifference, but instead, I asked her whether she wanted to join me downstairs for a movie. She looked up at me for the first time and smiled with a mildly excited “yes!”

I Didn't Feel Like It, But I Said Yes Anyway.

Now, the important thing to note here is that I was in no way, shape, or form in any mood whatsoever for a movie night. The evenings are starting to get chillier in Melbourne, and all I wanted to do was snuggle up in bed with a book. But something inside of me, call it a mother’s intuition, told me she really needed a pick-me-up right then, and so I responded with an equally excited “you choose!”

I don’t know yet what that time together meant to her. There were no explosive epiphanies since our movie night. No lightning strike of enlightenment, and I was right back to being the uncool, cringy, nosy, and often mean mom. Obviously, we hope - oh, how we hope - that these small moments of connection find their way into our kids' core memories.

Hoping Something Sticks.

But let’s be honest. Teenage brains are like dartboards, fishing nets, or those Velcro mitts we used as kids to catch sticky balls. We throw out advice, life lessons, and love, hoping a few hit the mark. Sometimes, they do. Sometimes, they don’t.

And that’s where consistency comes in.

Not every dart will hit the bullseye.

Not every fish will be caught.

Not every Velcro ball will stick.

But our job? Is to show up and throw anyway.

Keep Showing Up.

Keep telling them to pick up their socks and clean their room - they’ll eventually detest messy spaces.

Keep reminding them how much you love them - they’ll grow up knowing how to love themselves and others.

Keep praying for them - they’ll come to value the strength that comes from faith.

Keep asking about their day - you’ll catch little nuggets of their world in return.

Keep being kind - even in bickering moments, they’re often seeking validation and love.

Keep doing what you love - they’ll learn to find their own passions.

Keep watching their favourite movies - they’ll grow up treasuring family time.

Keep making Sunday lunches and keeping traditions - they’ll build their own one day.

Keep taking those family vacations - they’ll fall in love with the world and the memories made in it.

Parenting is a long game. A slow, steady, often thankless game. But in the end, consistency wins.

I’m freaking out! This book truly is magical.

Let me tell you a little anecdote about the magic of The Lost Bookshop and how it found me.

I get to about 96% of the novel on my Kindle and I’m completely FREAKING OUT - just a few weeks before discovering this book, I wrote a similar little story. If you've read The Lost Bookshop, you'll remember the upside-down stairwell that one of the protagonists, Opaline, writes about in her book A Place Called Lost. A stairwell that is obviously completely fictional. But, is it?

Okay, bear with me.

One morning in early May 2025, I woke up from a strange dream, as we all do sometimes. It was one of those vivid dreams that feels both real and surreal. You know, the one you're grasping frantically to hold onto. So, to not forget this strange dream, and while it was still fresh in my memory, I quickly grabbed my phone and wrote it down in my notes App. In my dream, there was an upside-down stairwell - twisting, disorienting, dark, and mysterious but I had no idea what it meant. By the time the kids left for school that morning, I had a pretty solid plot and a good idea of the direction my story was heading. What merely started as the ramblings of an overtired, overthinking, perhaps over-imaginative mind was turning into a mystery/magic short story before my eyes.

It was as if someone or something else had hijacked my sensory neurons and was directing the creative controls in my brain. I had no intention of actually writing a short story until I saw an ad for our community writing awards a couple of days later. I thought the plot that naturally developed as an extension of the dream was good, the pacing was nice, the characters were interesting, and I wanted to get to know them more, so I kept writing and entered my story in the writing competition.

That wasn't the end of the weirdness.

Fast forward to early June, about one month after my dream, when I first discovered Evie Wood' The Lost Bookshop. Obviously, I never read the book before, never discussed it with anyone, never read any reviews on it. Blissfully unaware of its existence and its magnificence, which is how I discover many great reads by the way. Truthfully, I’ve never been that big into the magical realism and fantasy genres (hint: I’ve been reading LOTR for years. I still haven’t gotten through all the books). But I love, love, love bookshops, so I decided to give this one a go.

Right now, I’m lying in bed, too euphoric to finish the last few pages. I literally had to close the book to pull myself together. THE STAIRWELL IN OPALINE'S NOVEL, IS THE SAME STAIRWELL I'VE SEEN IN MY DREAM!

What in the magical mystery is going on here?

Ultimately, the obsession with finding the lost bookshop is about rediscovering oneself; it's about being brave enough to rewrite the past, and having the courage to live our authentic story moving forward. "The thing about books", she said, "is that they help you imagine a life bigger and better than you could ever dream of."

A Story That Found Me Before I Found It.

Set between Paris, London, and Dublin, this beautiful novel by Evie is loaded with powerful themes on women's rights, DVA, and feminism. It is a clever blend of escapism and awareness, of realism and fantasy, and as you've gathered by now, centres around a mysterious bookshop and its mysterious stairwell.

For me, a stairwell symbolises moving forward. Whether ascending or descending, the choice is ours. We have within us the power to elevate ourselves beyond our past mistakes and current struggles. We are capable of reaching greater heights with the right support structure and breaking through invisible ceilings. Falling hurts, but if we make the right moves and put one foot in front of the other, success is imminent, and we are sure to meet it along the way. Success at love; success in our career, success with family, success in escaping oppression, degradation, and unappreciation.

A stairwell represents growth, being forgiving of ourselves and others, and getting back up when we stumble. We don't have to remain stuck in the past; we are able to side-step adversity and demand to get the same respect we give to those on our journey.

Maybe it was I who was lost all along and not the bookshop.’ - Opaline

Considering my short story takes a wildly different path than that of A Place Called Lost (but seemingly revolving around the same stairwell? or maybe just a similar stairwell?), it is a testament to our unique lived experiences and the stories we go on to tell, create, and change because of these experiences. It just shows to go you, there’s a lost bookshop in all of us waiting to be discovered.

I knew there was a strange kind of magic in these walls. Maybe not the kind you’d find in travelling shows or under the big top, but something far subtler than that. - Opaline

One of the most pleasantly surprising facts I learned from Britney’s book The Woman In Me, and which I didn’t mention in my initial review when I first read it, is that the princess of pop started her career under the wings of South African-born music producers. Yep, you heard right. The owners of Jive Records, one of the biggest music labels in the US at the time, were none other than our very own sons of the soil: Clive Calder and Ralph Simon (look them up!)

In her book, she gushed about meeting Clive, saying:

“I loved him from the second I met him.”

“He had a South African accent that made it sound to me like he was a character in an old movie. I never heard anyone talk that way in real life.”

Alongside Britney Spears, Jive also signed artists such as Janet Jackson, Backstreet Boys, and NSYNC! These guys basically produced the soundtrack of my entire childhood.

I love finding these little treasure troves of information about our beautiful and wildly talented South African folk in the most unexpected places. If you’ve ever doubted, let this be another reminder that South Africa is fertile ground. A land full of promise and her soil births the rarest of gems, both from its minerals and its people.

The more that you read, the more things you will know.

Beauty, Bitterness, and the Beginning of Healing

“As a little girl, I walked for hours alone in the silent woods behind my house in Louisiana, singing songs. Being outside gave me a sense of aliveness and danger. When I was growing up, my mother and father fought constantly. He was an alcoholic. I was usually scared in my home. Outside wasn’t necessarily heaven, either, but it was my world. Call it heaven or hell, it was mine. Before going home, I would follow a path to our neighbors’ house, through a landscaped yard and past a swimming pool. They had a rock garden full of small, soft pebbles that would trap the heat and stay warm in a way that felt so good against my skin. I would lie down on those rocks and look up at the sky, feeling the warmth from below and above, thinking: I can make my own way in life. I can make my dreams come true. Lying quietly on those rocks, I felt God.”

Despite this beautiful piece of prose, I sensed so much anger and bitterness while reading Britney’s memoir...or journal, really. Being the icon that she was, I expected a little more depth, and feel this book could’ve been everything. But it also could’ve been nothing. So, kudos to Britney for getting her story out and sharing it with the world.

I’m a firm believer that we all have extraordinary stories to tell. In fact, I think everyone should write a book!

Having been a huge Britney Spears fan growing up in the 90s, I’m happy I finally got to hear her life story and some of what went on behind the bright lights and glamour. I personally cannot wait for her next autobiography, once she’s healed, and the anger, pain, and trauma she’s clearly still grappling with feel a little less suffocating. This book, to me, felt like a prelude - a taste of what’s still to come.

I'm going to be honest, since it's the theme of this book. I only read Jennette McCurdy's memoir, I'm Glad My Mom Died, after discovering Jennifer Aniston is producing a series based on it, and I prefer to read the source material first. I also expected nothing more than a celebrity tell-all highlighting the struggles of being a child star with an overbearing mother. What I didn’t expect was a gut-wrenching, honest, often uncomfortable journey, and a completely dysfunctional mother. Wow, this poor girl never stood a chance. Even so, her story is not about hate. It’s about grief, healing, and moving on, and I'm glad I read it.

“The Nickelodeon Girl”

If you’re a Gen Z or the parent of Gen Z babies, then you’re most likely familiar with Jennette McCurdy of Sam and Cat and iCarly fame on Nickelodeon. Which is unfortunate, because she hates being remembered as a Nickelodeon kid. In her autobiography, Jennette laments how becoming an actress wasn't her dream but her mom's.

She recounts in detail her struggles as a child with a manipulative, narcissistic, mentally and physically abusive mother; and as a young woman, as a direct result of her upbringing, her battle with anorexia, binge-eating, and bulimia. She also goes into graphic detail about her unhealthy relationship with alcohol, men, and sex.

I'm glad I read Jennette’s story, because it once again brings into the spotlight the immense pressure and horrific abuse children are made to endure at the hands of the people who are meant to love and protect them most, for fame and fortune. The YouTube and TikTok pandemic we're in right now especially intensifies this kind of abuse.

Here's What I Learned Reading I'm Glad My Mom Died

1. Brutal Honesty

She writes about her childhood, her mother’s abusive behaviour, her struggles with eating disorders, addiction, and identity, and how jealousy manifests in the workplace. Jennette is not holding anything back. She's going after them all, and she's aiming for the jugular.

2. Codependence

It paints a clear picture of covert emotional abuse, the kind that hides behind “love” and “sacrifice” and the confusion many survivors of narcissistic parenting feel.

3. Self-Reflection

As a mother and my experience as a youth mentor, this book reminded me of the profound influence we have on the emotional and mental well-being of our children. It made me pause periodically and ask: Am I nurturing their individuality or projecting my own needs?

4. The Nuances of Eating Disorders

Jennette explains how her relationship with food was shaped by her mother’s obsession with control, appearance, and public perception. Jennette wanted nothing else in this world but to please her mom, and her mom took full advantage of that vulnerability.

5. The Dark Side of Child Stardom

She gives us a behind-the-scenes look at the toxic pressure young actors face on-screen, on-set, and in their own homes.

6. A Cautionary Tale In the Age of Social Media

These days, this kind of child exploitation at the hands of parents is playing out in even more dangerous ways through family vlog channels and “kidfluencers.” This book once again shines the spotlight squarely on this hidden monster.

7. Surprisingly Funny

Despite the heavy themes, Jennette’s dark humour and sarcasm make this a surprisingly pleasant read. One moment I was really angry, and the next I was laughing.

8. Deeply Validating

Contrary to what the title may suggest, this book isn’t about hatred. It’s about grief, healing, and moving on. Jennette shows us that you’re allowed to grieve what you never had and to walk away from people who harm you, even if they’re your own family.

9. A Reminder that Fame Does Not Equate To “Success”

Her story is a reminder that fame and fortune do not guarantee your success, peace, and authenticity. The Industry does not teach young kids to be bold, wise and brazen - you need to go into it self-assured and demand the respect you deserve.

10. Healing is Messy and That's Okay

Jennette is still in the healing process. She doesn't have it all figured out, and that makes the book even more powerful and real. Healing is messy, nonlinear, and brave.

Lesley and I were out in the city the other night, having a drink at one of Melbourne's gazillion rooftop bars. As we sipped our Long Island iced tea and Corona, drinking in the music, the vibes, and the views, it got us thinking - how in the world would we deal with the inevitable question from family and friends visiting Australia for the first time:

"So, What IS the Real Melbourne?"

It’s a simple question, but in a city like this, almost impossible to answer.

I often think that it will take a few lifetimes for me to see and experience all that this place has to offer. Melbourne is a megalopolis of culture, art, architecture, and endless tree-lined streets lit with energy and shaken by the vibrations of people from all walks of life. Its streets can literally go on forever and then unexpectedly slip into dark and mysterious alleyways that lead you straight to your next favourite dumpling joint, hidden cafe, or bar.

It is a city where new shows fresh off Broadway and indie theatre can send your head into a spin as their bright lights meet you on every corner. Where secondhand bookstores live comfortably next to neon-lit sneaker drops, and your next fashion find could be from a thrift store, a subway-turned-shopping centre, or a mega mall several stories high.

A city of laneways, layers, and late-night discoveries. Our family has been living here for just over two years, and we’re still trying to keep up, let alone define it. Because here’s the thing:

Melbourne doesn’t stand still. It evolves, devolves, reinvents, proliferates, and surprises.

Daily.

So, how on earth do you begin to show someone the real Melbourne?

Truth is: you don’t. Because Melbourne is something different to everyone.

To some, it’s sipping a flat white at a café where the barista knows your dog’s name before exploring the beaches. To others, it’s getting lost in an NGV exhibition, hitting the Queen Vic Market before the lunch rush, scoring a different sporting event every day of the week, a live concert, or discovering an underground jazz bar you swear wasn’t there last week.

To know the REAL Melbourne, to discover its quirks and beauty, you must first get lost, and you’ll be amazed by what you find.

I've been searching for a practical yet luxurious, affordable quality bag for a while now. It's not easy finding handcrafted Italian leather that doesn't also cost a small fortune. It's like waiting for your one true love - finding the right one takes patience, and you certainly don't force it. It finds YOU. It's destiny. So, when I stumbled upon the Vestirsi range, I took it as a sign of divine intervention and wasted no time. I've never been happier about a purchase.

I'm a nervous buyer, and I often feel debilitating guilt when making a splurge purchase, even if it's something I desperately need. I felt no guilt at all when I ordered my Vestirsi Bella bag. In fact, I've been obsessing over her since she arrived! She's so buttery soft, easy to wear, and elevates any look.

As dual citizens, we often find ourselves between countries, and a versatile bag that is also comfortable, durable, and stylish becomes a staple for travel, especially when traveling with kids. It's also an office conversation starter, has a great amount of space for shopping trips, it's convenient for exploring the city, and for all the moments in between when you need your hands freed up. The Bella ticks all those boxes for me, and I look forward to heaps of adventures together. Shop Vestirsi

I’m here for the Gillian Flynn-esque mystery with a dash of E.L. James spice!

Nothing Is As It Seems

Although "Verity" takes a turn away from the romance books Colleen Hoover’s known for, it still tries to weave in the romance and sex, albeit an annoyingly excessive amount of sex. I love psychological thrillers, and the times during the novel when Hoover sneaks in the occasional spooky scene, I got really excited. Unfortunately, these moments were fleeting. There was a lot of potential lost with this book. But, as an aspiring writer myself, I give credit where it’s due. Reading the acknowledgements, I learned that "Verity" was actually a self-published indie project, a breakaway from Hoover’s otherwise traditionally published books (for whatever reason). So, as soon as I didn't get too technical and into the details, the storyline succeeded in captivating me, and all I wanted to do throughout was to get to the ending so I could finally figure out what the heck was going on! It was bizarre, and I was here for all of it.

Plot-Heavy, Character-Light

Lowen’s character, although the main protagonist, is underdeveloped, and her backstory has many plot holes. You would then expect the book’s titular character, Verity, to be more fully formed, but she just isn’t either. We never get any closure on the backstories of any of the characters, and we are left with many questions, mostly character-related. This, however, becomes less of an issue as soon as you realize it was the author’s plan all along. Writers are fluid, and writing is fluid with no hard or fast rules. We are taken on a journey through the mind of the author, and I believe a book is best enjoyed by the reader when we realize we are on someone else’s journey and appreciate the view from their vantage point.

An Unreliable Narrator

First off, the book is written in the first person from Lowen's point of view. Everything we see and feel throughout the book is through Lowen’s eyes. Lowen, however, has suffered a lifetime of trauma, chronic sleepwalking (which, by the way, is never explained), but I've read up on it a little, and medications used for mental health issues can be a driver for sleepwalking; her unhinged relationship with her mom, and her eventual death. All of this leads up to the gruesome accident she witnesses at the start of the novel. It’s safe to say that Lowen’s been through A LOT and depends on Xanax to manage her anxiety. These, combined with the creep factor of living with a comatose woman who sometimes opens her eyes and makes sudden movements, are enough to send anyone spiraling. It's worth noting that Lowen also has the hots for coma lady’s hot husband. By the time she is called in to help finish Verity’s book series, she’s not exactly in a rational headspace. What follows ends in tragedy no matter which way you look at it.

The Leading Lady and Also The Antagonist

Or is she the antagonist? Verity may spend most of the book in a “coma,” but she absolutely is the star of the show here. Whether she’s a master manipulator or just a “chronic,” as she puts it, is up to you to decide. In hindsight, the plot twist seems obvious, but I must admit I did not see this one coming. From the moment we meet Verity, through Lowen, she is made into the Wicked Witch of the West. Her jump scare “exorcist” moments are what carry the book through to the bitter end. As a mystery/horror fan, I wish Colleen committed more of her time to these sinister moments that had me shrieking at times. In the end, there are no winners here.

Moral Of The Story:

Don’t lie

Never read someone else’s private thoughts

If there’s breath, there’s life

And don’t fall for another woman’s man

I switched up my latest read for something a little different. I didn’t necessarily go for any particular storyline, but I was looking for a different perspective. I wanted to learn something new, and I found it all in Lone Women by Victor Lavalle. A Gothic-horror Western about strong, fearless, interdependent women in the early Wild West of the US. Historical fiction with a dash of the paranormal. Different is what I was looking for, and different is what I got.

Forgotten Past or Hidden Past?

Adelaide Henry, a young black woman at the turn of the 20th century, has big dreams to make a new life for herself. She's had a hard one growing up, and her parents have both just died, rather gruesomely. Inspired by black female pioneers before her, she decides to start her new life homesteading in central Montana. Whether forgotten or just an unpopular historical topic, very little appears to be known about the Homestead Act, which provided land to anyone willing to live on, improve, and cultivate it, no matter the colour of their skin.

Remarkably, this period gave rise to a subculture known as the lone women. These were "women who didn't need a man to cosign for their tracts of land," a fact that Lavalle was surprised to learn during a previous visit to a university bookstore in Montana. Surprising, I'm sure, since Black people, and much less Black women, in those days were rarely given many (if any) advantages. What was even more astonishing to Lavalle was that not even those born in Montana were aware of the history of the lone women - strong, fearless, interdependent female homesteaders of the Wild West. A part of history that seems to have been swept under the rug.

The Author's Muse

“There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy.” Shakespeare's quote was the first that jumped to my mind after finishing Lone Women. It sure dredges up many ghosts. Although Lavalle is influenced by Stephen King, Dean Koontz fans may notice some elements of “Phantoms” in there, although admittedly not quite as atmospheric. It may be biased, but I did also sense a little Flanagan - flawless writing, thoughtful dialogue, and haunting characters. Lone Women is a story preceded by trauma, ghosts, and monsters (all of them the same thing, really). The monsters within us and those lurking in the night, in the dark.

The Monsters We Carry Around

Adelaide has been walking around with a heavy burden her whole life. The burden of turning her back on her duty to take over the family farm built on Native American land, and also the deep shame she feels from her parents keeping her sister, Elizabeth, locked away and chained up in the barn for decades. The mysterious steamer trunk she drags around with her when she eventually leaves the family home is more than just luggage; it is a metaphor for the shame her family has been carrying around for generations and which Adelaide now takes upon herself - a generational curse. The story also has religious undertones, and although they are subtle, it is clearly a cry for help in the harsh world Adelaide finds herself navigating.

The suitcase is Adelaide’s burden. She is afraid of it, but also feels responsible for it. She hides its true purpose from others, and she’s deeply ashamed of its contents. The very thing she feels most responsible for is also the reason for the trauma and fear she's always had to endure. When the suitcase and its contents are finally exposed, it’s like a weight’s been lifted from Adelaide’s shoulders. By letting its contents out, she lets others in.

Lone Women is a horror novel, yes, but not the kind of horror with jump scares and ghosts. It’s an allegory for the ghosts we carry around within us, the kind of violence that eats us from the inside. It’s not the kind of horror that comes solely from the writer's imagination, but highlights the reality of the horrors we are faced with all the time on a human level. And THAT is some truly scary stuff.

As soon as Adelaide welcomes her community of fellow lone women and she befriends the town's people, her burdens are lifted. Lone Women is thus ultimately a lesson that people are not created to be alone; that in life, we need each other, we need a community that believes in us. As much as we fight against it, people need people. We need God.

When Illness Changes Everything

Lately, I've been enjoying listening to podcasts, and recently I discovered an episode featuring Emma Willis on The Oprah Podcast. She opens up about her unexpected journey as Bruce Willis's caregiver following his diagnosis of FTD (Frontotemporal Dementia). Excellent interview, btw. Very informative. I think it’s one of those discussions where we could all take away something valuable.

It definitely resonated with me. Although her situation is obviously vastly different - each one is - the conversation took me back to a particularly life-changing time in my twenties. I was breastfeeding my one-month-old when the phone rang. My mom had suffered a massive stroke during the night. The doctors told us her brain was severely damaged. There was nothing more they could do. I remember it like a fever dream.

Even though she survived the stroke, her laughter was stilled, her voice quieted, her movements restricted. She was at the complete mercy of those around her and who loved her.

My big sister took on the monumental task of caring for our mom, becoming her primary caregiver. I can’t speak for her, but I appreciate the immense mental, emotional, and physical strength that this role requires, especially when it’s a loved one. As Emma mentioned in the podcast, you often feel a strong sense of responsibility to take it all upon yourself. You feel guilty for asking for help because this is YOUR husband, YOUR mom, YOUR child.

Why No One Should Carry the Load Alone

Every caregiving journey is unique and often shaped by complicated relationships. It feels even heavier when the relationship between you and your loved one is strained. I wouldn’t call my relationship with my mom strained, but it certainly wasn’t all rosy. There was a lot of hurt and trauma, making it challenging for all of us. Listening to Emma’s journey and hearing from others who shared their unique experiences as caregivers on the podcast made me eternally grateful to my sister for doing everything she could to ensure Mom was comfortable during her final years with us.

Thankfully, my sister eventually asked for help from a nearby nursing home. That decision saved our family from a lot of anger, hurt, and disappointment, allowing us to “deal and heal” while mom received the care and stimulation we simply weren’t equipped to provide.

There’s obviously much more to my story. Only those who have suddenly and unexpectedly been thrust into a role requiring full-time care for a loved one experiencing a severely debilitating diagnosis will understand how complex and nuanced each situation can be. One constant, however, remains true across all situations: caregivers need all the help they can get. We are often unprepared for the mental, emotional, and physical burden that comes with taking everything upon ourselves. So, if you know a caregiver, check in on them. Offer something small. Don’t wait for them to ask for help because asking is often the hardest part. It really does take a village.

10 Reasons To Support Carers

1. Every journey is unique


No two caregiving stories are the same.

2. Illness changes everything


Life may never return to what it was before.

3. The load is invisible


Carers juggle emotional, mental, and physical strain.

4. Guilt is heavy


They often feel they must do it all alone.

5. Relationships shape the role


Past hurt or trauma makes caregiving even harder.

6. Asking for help is brave


Support is strength, not weakness.

7. Professional care can heal


Nursing homes or services can save families from burnout.

8. Carers need their own space


Without help, they risk losing themselves.

9. Small acts mean a lot


A meal, an errand, a kind word lightens the load.

10. It takes a village


Caring is never meant to be done alone.

As a South African mama now living in Australia, something we don’t always think through when immigrating is how much extra help we leave behind. Whether it’s family pitching in or just the convenience and access to other affordable services. That kind of support isn’t as easy to come by here. Manual labour in Australia is crazy expensive! So, like many other families before us and those still to come, we’ve had to find many little ways to make a crazy busy life a little less chaotic.

As a big family of five, ironing remains one of those endless tasks. I’d go through a full basket at least twice a week - like being stuck in a revolving door. And honestly, I don't particularly enjoy the process of ironing. Some people find it cathartic. I don't. But I am obsessed with the feel of warm, freshly pressed clothes on my skin - instead of looking like I just got dressed straight from the laundry basket.

So I continued to push on with my ironing until someone (a young person) commented in horror:“Wow, I haven’t seen one of those in ages!”

Wait… does no one iron their clothes anymore? Am I stuck in a bygone era? Needless to say, my old ironing board and iron are now officially retired after I (reluctantly) made the switch to the more contemporary, cool, and conveniently portable handheld steamer.

Why I Made the Switch

I must admit I was skeptical about handheld steamers for a long time. I just didn't think they were up to the task, but I decided to give it a try anyway if it meant averting funny stares from my kids' friends. After a quick Google search, I settled on the Philips 7000 series, closed my eyes, and pushed "Order". To tell you I was shocked at how quick these little dynamos are, will be an understatement. With three teens and a mountain of weekly laundry, I needed something that could save time without sacrificing results.

First Impressions

I actually enjoy ironing (or steaming, rather) for the first time in forever! The Philips 7000 is compact, lightweight, and easy to handle. It heats up quickly and, to my surprise, handled even the toughest creases on shirts and trousers with ease. The steam flow is powerful, which is the thing I’d been most skeptical about before trying it.

The Water Tank

One of the most common complaints I’ve heard about handheld steamers is the small water tank. But the 7000 Series actually has a slightly larger tank than many other models, which means I can get through quite a few items before needing to refill.

Everyday Use

For me, the biggest win has been time. What used to take me hours with the iron and board now takes a fraction of that. It's also perfect for everyday use and travel. I love that I can freshen up a shirt or dress in a couple of minutes, without hauling out the whole ironing setup. It also came with a convenient heat-proof travel bag, so I just leave it hanging on the clothes rack for easy use. And the best part? My old ironing board and iron are officially packed away. They’re still there “just in case,” but honestly, I haven’t touched them since getting the steamer.

Final Thoughts

The Philips Handheld Steamer 7000 Series. Game. Changer. If you’re juggling a busy family schedule and still want your clothes to look neat and polished, the Philips Handheld Steamer 7000 Series is a game-changer. It’s small but mighty, easy to use, and saves me so much time.